At the extremes

Ash Wednesday isn't for a couple more weeks so I'm jumping the gun a bit on this post, but this thought came to me a couple days ago and I wanted to record it.

I've been thinking a little bit about (take your pick) Satan/the devil/evil force/the enemy lately. I don't know if I've ever clearly come to some decision about what exactly I believe about God's opposite, but I do believe there is opposite force/power in our world. However you name it, I've been struck lately that this force will often take me to the extremes. For example, I've been feeling a little anxious lately about our new church's finances and whether enough money will be forthcoming in gifts and pledges. Nothing in particular has happened that should plant this doubt in my mind--just stuff I ruminate on when I wake up at 3 a.m. But the anxiety gets planted and then takes me to places I shouldn't really go, e.g. it's a bad economy so we'll never have enough money and I should never have left my previous church and oh, woe, is me...

You see? Taken to an extreme that isn't good for anybody.

On the other hand, it's also not good to be at the other end of that extreme, namely, oh, don't worry about it at all. The money will come so there's no need to plan or ask for money or start teaching about stewardship. That also won't get us anywhere.

This same kind of thinking has applied when I think about my own gifts and graces. I've been at one extreme where I think that I have no talents at all and I should just probably quit the ministry and I've been at the other end where I think that, quite possibly, I may be the best preacher in the country. Not good to be at either end.

What does this have to do with Ash Wednesday? A common text that people reflect on early in Lent is the story of Jesus' temptation by Satan (Luke 4:1-13). Satan tempts Jesus to do some pretty extreme stuff. Turn a stone into bread. Jump off the pinnacle of the Temple. Jesus doesn't fall for this trap, though, and begins his ministry.

Balance has always been important to me and I think that's true when thinking about a force that pushes me to extremes. I'd rather be centered in the unfailing love of God.